- No good, knowledgeable information is ever followed by the statement, "And I'll hang up and listen to your answer." Get a cell plan that's got a decent number of minutes and don't be afraid that you might have to engage in some actual discourse about your ignorant, piss-anty little opinion. If you ain't got balls, don't call.
- Station programmers who have a show only because they are the programming director. This is the Mickey Dearstone Principle. And it doesn't matter how hot (well, cute anyways) the girl you put on the show with you is (Nurse Nickie, Heather Harrington, etc.). It's radio, not television, and in radio, unlike life, functionality actually trumps appearance.
- Stupid caller nicknames. Examples: The Cattleman, Small Mike, Titans Sheep...wait, all those were the same guy, which brings us to number four on the list...
- Callers who have nothing better to do than call every freaking show on the local radio dial because their poor, pitiful little lives have all the variety of a nun's sex life. Especially when they insist on asking the same question on every show.
- Callers who stutter, badly. Sorry, I've got a speech impediment too. It doesn't make me feel better to hear someone put in a position to be ridiculed by taking five minutes to say five words.
- Shows with equipment so bad that you can hear the host's laptop in the background when he gets an email. (Sorry, Basilio, I have to be fair.)
- Hosts who are so far up the coach's posterior that their nickname is Jimmy Hemmorrhoid.
- Athlete interviews. I'm sorry, but the average interview with an athlete is about as entertaining as watching flies swarm around an outhouse, and the younger the athlete, usually the more painful it is to listen too. The older athletes tend to speak only in safe, non-controversial language and the younger athletes usually are media virgins and have no idea what they should really be saying.
- Callers who ask the same question as the last caller, after uttering the phrase, "I just got the radio on and I'm not sure if you guys have covered this yet." No, you didn't just get on, you've been on hold for 45 minutes and you're going to ask that damn question no matter what. Just be honest about it.
- Hosts that act like being on the air makes their opinion more important than everyone else. In reality, they are less valuable, most of the time, than the intern that answers their phone.
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
10 Things That Make Sports Radio Suck.
Like most things KSR related, most/all of the items on this list can be found in the Knoxville market, but I'm sure there are other spots in the country that feel my pain.
Saturday, December 6, 2008
Times Are Tight At The Animal
Let me start this out by saying that the whole reason that I started this (rarely-updated) blog was because of the Animal's decision to pull Jim Rome from their station in order to put on more of the dreaded "local programming". Much to my surprise, the new show in the 12-3 slot was pretty entertaining, mainly because John Pennington is a knowledgeable sports guy who has a good balance of being informative while not taking himself too seriously.
Then the Animal basically told John that he cost too much to keep and they escorted him off the airwaves. What was their idea to put into this three-hour block of absent programming?
How about the great idea of three separate shows...hosted by the same two jock-sniffers Josh Ward and Chip (no one knows how to spell my name when they rip me on message boards) Caine/Cain/Kain/Cane/Nobody cares what your damn name is. Ward isn't brutal, but Chip is as welcome as a yeast infection in a house off ill repute.
Three different hour-long shows, hosted by the same two guys. If that doesn't confuse the hell out of callers and listeners I'll be shocked. You get a lot of calls in the third hour from people wanting to discuss topics from the first hour and the hosts are too incompetent to steer back the conversation.
Show grade:
Fail.
Then the Animal basically told John that he cost too much to keep and they escorted him off the airwaves. What was their idea to put into this three-hour block of absent programming?
How about the great idea of three separate shows...hosted by the same two jock-sniffers Josh Ward and Chip (no one knows how to spell my name when they rip me on message boards) Caine/Cain/Kain/Cane/Nobody cares what your damn name is. Ward isn't brutal, but Chip is as welcome as a yeast infection in a house off ill repute.
Three different hour-long shows, hosted by the same two guys. If that doesn't confuse the hell out of callers and listeners I'll be shocked. You get a lot of calls in the third hour from people wanting to discuss topics from the first hour and the hosts are too incompetent to steer back the conversation.
Show grade:
Fail.
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
Mike Griffith's Agendas Are Still Boring
I remember when I once thought that Mike Griffith was just an agenda-oriented blowhard who was more interested in pushing his own limited opinions than he was of doing any kind of reporting.
I still think that way, only now it has become even more evident that I am right.
On the News-Sentinels paid advertisement/radio show, Griffith has been in the past a brutal critic of coach Phil Fulmer. I've listened to many shows where Griffith has spent hours talking about how far Tennessee football has fallen.
Until now. Now, as Tennessee is in the midst of possibly its worst season ever, he is starting to play the role of "who are we going to get", by defending Fulmer every chance he gets. This is just weeks after Fulmer called him out during a press conference with the comment, "I don't see you at practice, Mike." Instead of taking Fulmer to task for his comments, Griffin has turned into a lap-dog for Fulmer, and it seems like he's done a 180 degree turn.
Maybe Coach Pearl told Mikey-boy that if he didn't start easing up on Mr. Fulmer, that basketball practice might be a little harder for him to cover in the future?
Is it because the Sentinel's competition at that hour, Tony Basilio is calling for Fulmer's job, and Griffith wants to be different?
More than likely though it's just little Griff trying to get cheap heat in the Knoxville market. He doesn't really have a belief or an opinion, he just picks the opposite side of what public sentiment is and plays it for all it's worth. At least writer John Adams had the balls to call for Fulmer's head, before the season ever started. One has to wonder, if the season was going different, if the team were 8-0 instead of 3-5, if he would be on the radio talking about how UT's season was just a fluke and that the program was still on the decline.
I think so.
I still think that way, only now it has become even more evident that I am right.
On the News-Sentinels paid advertisement/radio show, Griffith has been in the past a brutal critic of coach Phil Fulmer. I've listened to many shows where Griffith has spent hours talking about how far Tennessee football has fallen.
Until now. Now, as Tennessee is in the midst of possibly its worst season ever, he is starting to play the role of "who are we going to get", by defending Fulmer every chance he gets. This is just weeks after Fulmer called him out during a press conference with the comment, "I don't see you at practice, Mike." Instead of taking Fulmer to task for his comments, Griffin has turned into a lap-dog for Fulmer, and it seems like he's done a 180 degree turn.
Maybe Coach Pearl told Mikey-boy that if he didn't start easing up on Mr. Fulmer, that basketball practice might be a little harder for him to cover in the future?
Is it because the Sentinel's competition at that hour, Tony Basilio is calling for Fulmer's job, and Griffith wants to be different?
More than likely though it's just little Griff trying to get cheap heat in the Knoxville market. He doesn't really have a belief or an opinion, he just picks the opposite side of what public sentiment is and plays it for all it's worth. At least writer John Adams had the balls to call for Fulmer's head, before the season ever started. One has to wonder, if the season was going different, if the team were 8-0 instead of 3-5, if he would be on the radio talking about how UT's season was just a fluke and that the program was still on the decline.
I think so.
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
Doc, Jeff, and Heather Discuss Hi-Fives
Three days before the Tennessee/Alabama game and the local yokels of Doc, Jeff, and Heather in the morning spent nearly an hour discussing where the hi-five originated.
Truly riveting.
Almost as riveting as their discussion the previous day about whether Eric Berry should play some offense for the Vols. The obvious answer to this question is yes, which is probably why none of the three thought so. Old man Deerstone/Dearstone/Dear Idiot, gave the argument that since UT already had Gerald Jones running the shotgun package that there was no real reason to use Berry.
Ignoring the fact that Jones is going to be out for two weeks, plus the fact that although Jones is a good player, Berry is a great one and could contend for the big trophy if he was given the chance to shine like Charles Woodson did for Michigan on both sides of the ball. Ignore those two little details and here's the big one: what are we risking? The team is 3-4 and the season has become the Nightmare before Christmas (about the time we'll be looking for a new coach). What have we got to lose at this point?
The three did not know that Woodson played on offense when he won the Heisman.
Why am I not surprised.
Truly riveting.
Almost as riveting as their discussion the previous day about whether Eric Berry should play some offense for the Vols. The obvious answer to this question is yes, which is probably why none of the three thought so. Old man Deerstone/Dearstone/Dear Idiot, gave the argument that since UT already had Gerald Jones running the shotgun package that there was no real reason to use Berry.
Ignoring the fact that Jones is going to be out for two weeks, plus the fact that although Jones is a good player, Berry is a great one and could contend for the big trophy if he was given the chance to shine like Charles Woodson did for Michigan on both sides of the ball. Ignore those two little details and here's the big one: what are we risking? The team is 3-4 and the season has become the Nightmare before Christmas (about the time we'll be looking for a new coach). What have we got to lose at this point?
The three did not know that Woodson played on offense when he won the Heisman.
Why am I not surprised.
Sunday, September 7, 2008
Welcome To KSR
I'd like to welcome to you, the reader, to Knoxville Sports Radio, a website dedicated to giving the Knoxville sports market what it has needed for a long time.
A reality check.
A notice that bad sports radio will not be tolerated in this market any longer.
An enema from bad local sports hosts who know so little about sports that it is agonizing to even attempt to listen to it.
We (and I say we because I'm not the only one in this enterprise) are dedicated to shining a light on the idiocy of local radio hosts and callers, who are only capable of discussing one topic (Tennessee sports) and are capable of butchering that topic very badly ninety percent of the time.
There is some good sports radio in Knoxville, and we won't be shy in giving compliments when they are deserved. But, I'll go ahead and show my own bias, just in fairness to the place that is going to be our number one target. The final straw came when 99.3 decided to cancel the only national show in a 14-hour block of local programming, The Jim Rome Show, in favor of what is sure to be some more of the same callers, same opinions, and same old tired UT football takes. Already disenfranchised with the product of 99.3 (especially, the morning show), this act was the catalyst for the idea of a critical site about the Knoxville sports scene.
So now you have it. We'll try not to get personal with anyone, but if someone is offended because we are critical of their talent (or lack thereof), or because of their lack of knowledge, we have a simple suggestion:
Get better, or quit.
Either way, Knoxville benefits.
I don't know how often we'll be updating this site. The better the radio, the less we'll gripe, the worse the radio the more venom we'll have to spew.
If you have a suggestion, or if you would like to contribute to the site, drop some info in the comments section and we'll get back to you. We'll have an email address that we can be contacted at soon.
A reality check.
A notice that bad sports radio will not be tolerated in this market any longer.
An enema from bad local sports hosts who know so little about sports that it is agonizing to even attempt to listen to it.
We (and I say we because I'm not the only one in this enterprise) are dedicated to shining a light on the idiocy of local radio hosts and callers, who are only capable of discussing one topic (Tennessee sports) and are capable of butchering that topic very badly ninety percent of the time.
There is some good sports radio in Knoxville, and we won't be shy in giving compliments when they are deserved. But, I'll go ahead and show my own bias, just in fairness to the place that is going to be our number one target. The final straw came when 99.3 decided to cancel the only national show in a 14-hour block of local programming, The Jim Rome Show, in favor of what is sure to be some more of the same callers, same opinions, and same old tired UT football takes. Already disenfranchised with the product of 99.3 (especially, the morning show), this act was the catalyst for the idea of a critical site about the Knoxville sports scene.
So now you have it. We'll try not to get personal with anyone, but if someone is offended because we are critical of their talent (or lack thereof), or because of their lack of knowledge, we have a simple suggestion:
Get better, or quit.
Either way, Knoxville benefits.
I don't know how often we'll be updating this site. The better the radio, the less we'll gripe, the worse the radio the more venom we'll have to spew.
If you have a suggestion, or if you would like to contribute to the site, drop some info in the comments section and we'll get back to you. We'll have an email address that we can be contacted at soon.
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